Lack of sleep and high emotions have me shaking and tight chested. I know not what lies before me in Malibu as I fly across the green fields of Kansas. I feel the kiss of my husband still lingering on my quivering lip. I don't want anymore tears today. The last few years of my life I feel I've been scared of everything. Today, that changes. Today I will be FEARLESS. For this shall be the adventure of a lifetime. In my heart i know that I will never be the same person again. The Lyndee that will return at the end of this month will believe she is as strong as everyone thinks she is. Lyndee 2.0, new and improved. So instead of focusing on what I'm leaving behind this morning, I'm focusing on all I stand to gain. Returning to my home of many years. California is where I've always been strong. The place where a naive college graduate from Iowa decided she would tackle the world and wouldn't be stopped. People told me California was scary and would swallow me whole but I had never felt so at home and alive. In a few short hours I will feel her sun on my face again. The smell of the ocean. The salt on the breeze. I will take on this adventure the only way I know how. Head on, like a Hagebakke. Fearless.
I have to say that flying is much easier when you are under 300 pounds. I haven't flown in 6 years. It was humiliating torture to say the least. I barely fit in the seat, the arms of the chairs stabbed me in my sides, or my chubbies, as I like to refer to the spare tire/muffin top area I had grown accustomed to. Today there was no need to ask for a seat belt extender. I have about 6 inches to spare rather than trying make it work without an extender and losing feeling in my lower appendages as I had done before out of stubborn pride. A 767 is by no means comfie to anyone, I don't think, but today is the most comfortable ride I have ever had. Now if only we hadn't left Dallas 2 hours late. Very glad I got to spend some time with my uncle Norm and his family though. Made the hours go by much quicker than twiddling my thumbs in an airport terminal.
Wow ! I must be tired. Three hours of sporadic sleep makes for a ditzy and delirious Lyndee. The stewardess walked by passing out a small yellow bag. I thought she said pretzels and took them because I'm dang hungry. Then I curse the cheap bastards in my head when she hands it to me and it's light as a feather. Really? What did you give me just three pretzels? I open the bag and it's not pretzels at all. It's headphones. Umm, oops. Cant eat those. Sorry for cursing you in my head.
Angry birds is properly named. I've never been so bad at something, yet so addicted. I don't even know if we're out of Texas yet. I think I'm going cross-eyed from lack of sleep. Cross-eyed plus traveling at a few hundred miles an hour is making me giggle. That and this morph a picture feature I'm playing with. It's like a circus fun house of mirrors.
I feel bad for the four year old twins in front of me. And their parents. Poor little guys are pretty crabby and this super rough turbulence is freaking them out. They could probably help me past the next level of angry birds. Then we all win. Pondering how to offer this suggestion without being a creepy lady.
Welcome to California. Glorious words oh captain, my captain. As we fly over Palm Springs and Riverside so many memories flood my mind. I am excited. I am fearless. I am here.