Love your reality

The best part about spending four weeks in a dream is realizing how much you love your reality.  I am back in Iowa after an incredible 27 day stay at Biggest Loser Fitness Ridge.  It was better than I ever dreamed it would be, and harder too!  It flew by in an instant but changed my life forever.  I will forever be grateful at the opportunity Amanda and the people at Fitness Ridge gave me.  I made wonderful friends, found an inner strength that had long been forgotten and came back feeling like I hold the world in my hand.  I also came back with an appreciation of how much I love my life.  I am very blessed in many ways and it’s so nice to be able to focus on that joy rather than negativity and pity.  The little things like sleeping in my own bed, being able to drive my car and seeing the green of an Iowa spring brought me tremendous joy.  Being back in the arms of my loved ones brought tears to my eyes and overwhelmed my heart.  Being back in the gym with Scott and Molly brought soreness to my shoulders and thighs but a huge smile to my face.

While at the resort I lost 18 pounds, 14 inches and 3.2% body fat!! I’m smaller than I have been since junior high school which was many, many moons ago.  I bought a dress to wear to my big reveal that was half the size of the clothes I was wearing when Molly and I began our journey.  I’ve discovered muscles on my body I never knew existed.  I have gained an appreciation for life which has resulted in an attitude overhaul and the power of positivity. 

But possibly the most important thing I found while at the resort was forgiveness.  As much as I am excited by the physical changes I made while I was away, it was the emotional baggage I lost which made me feel so much lighter.  I’ve thought hard about the things that have hurt me in the past and lead to my emotional eating, self-loathing and pain.  I’ve thought about those people that have wronged me.  I thought about mistakes that I have made or regrets that I was harboring.  And then one day as I choked back tears on the elliptical while I listened to Katina encourage forgiveness I did the most amazing thing…I let it all go.  Why was I carrying around negative things I could not go back and change no matter how hard I tried? Why was I letting that weigh me down?  I will not forget that pain and some of the lessons I have learned the hard way in life but I have forgiven and it is the most liberating thing I have ever felt.  I love the fact that my body continues to get lighter each week and finally, my heart and brain have caught up as well. 

Numerous people have asked me for advice and as I am not certified in anything I am sometimes leery to make recommendations.  I can only tell you what has worked for me on my journey and I have broken it down as simply as I can…Smile.  Love completely (this includes loving yourself).  Release your pain.  Move more.  Eat less.  Find balance and moderation in food, work and life in general.  Don’t be too proud to ask for help.  Lend an ear.  Stop worrying about what you don’t have and appreciate what you do.  Make time for you.  Be fearless. 

My journey is far from over but each day I get closer to new milestones and I am so excited to continue to share those with all of you! I will wrap this up with one of my favorite quotes.  I kept it on my nightstand while I was away and I encourage you to shine, every day a little more than the last.  

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.  Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.  It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?  Actually, who are you not to be?  Your playing small does not serve the world.  There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.  We are all meant to shine, as children do.  It's not just in some of us: it's in everyone.  And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.  As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."  Marianne Williamson